-and it'll drive Muslim jihadis crazy, never knowing when they are fighting the gays

Satirist Paul Rudnick takes on the repeal of DADT:

I do not see how permitting open homosexuality in these communities enhances their prospects of success in battle. Indeed, I believe repealing “don’t ask, don’t tell” will weaken the warrior culture at a time when we have a fight on our hands. 

—General Merrill A. McPeak, former Air Force Chief of Staff, on the Op-Ed page of the Times. 

My name is Marine Corporal Roger T., and I am one gay soldier who agrees wholeheartedly with General McPeak, although I think that he doesn’t go far enough. Because my staying closeted, in fact, makes me a better soldier, through what I term sublimation. For example: Right before heading out into a firefight with Iraqi insurgents, I always imagine myself at the beach with Merrill A. McPeak, both of us in helmets, camouflage-print Speedos, combat boots, and sunglasses. I picture myself rubbing sunblock all over the luscious, leathery hide of General McPeak, and the adrenaline rockets through my veins, and by the time I leave the Green Zone I’m ready to kill anything that moves, and then make savage, passionate love to its corpse. I’m at what I like to call my sensual, combat-ready McPeak

Read more: http://www.newyorker.com/humor/2010/03/22/100322sh_shouts_rudnick?printable=true#ixzz0iRGoOMF6