Follow Waldo on Facebook!

Saturday, October 8, 2016

Pat McCrory's true north

tictacs.jpg

The Governor of Utah withdrew his endorsement of Donald Trump for President yesterday.

Early yesterday.

North Carolina Governor Pat McCrory had to think about it.

McCrory is a political Kama Sutra artist: his positions on sex, and what to do about it, where, just about run the gamut of human experience.

The Tar Hell State’s frat boy governor is not alone among white guys who love the old madonna/whore dichotomy and its infinite elasticity in practice. That how America treats women and girls seems to be shifting into fixed, right and wrong categories vexes him.

He has gotten on well this year by deflecting the head of his party’s ticket comments savaging women by changing the subject to men who aren’t really women but dress like them to- as The Donald would say- pop some Tic-tacs, enter a public restroom, spot a woman, “grab her by the pussy” and “try to fuck her.”

On February 22, the Governor criticized Charlotte for “changing basic long-established values and norms” and raises the specter of women and children being molested or assaulted as a result of the non-discrimination ordinance,” and creating “major public safety issues by putting citizens in possible danger from deviant actions by individuals taking improper advantage of a bad policy.”

In April he said,“This is not about discrimination, it is about common-sense etiquette, and I’m going to fight for that common-sense etiquette.” A few weeks later, he said, “The right and expectation of privacy in one of the most private areas of our personal lives is now in jeopardy.”

After thinking about it til nearly midnight last night, Governor McCrory said, “I condemn in the strongest possible terms the comments made by Donald Trump regarding women. I find them disgusting.”

But not bad enough to withdraw his endorsement.

Apparently, the difference between finding the comments of America’s Silvio Berlusconi disgusting, and rolling out a law to prevent sexual abuse of women by, inter alia, freezing the North Carolina minimum wage, is that when Donald Trump doesn’t score, he mitigates his disdain and lust by taking his target to pick out an eight-piece Naugahyde sectional at Rooms-to-Go.

Not even America’s Dad, Bill Cosby,showed such solicitude- though, admittedly, drugged Jello Pops are faster than having to spend an afternoon navigating the maze that is Ikea.

Pat McCrory and Donald Trump live by the Frat Boy Code. So does Brock Turner, the Stanford swimmer who faced a 14-sentence for sexual assault and got six months, serving a little over three.

His sentencer, Judge Persky, read from a statement made by the anonymous victim, referred to as Jane Doe. He acknowledged how the assault damaged her life: “So, as she writes, ‘the damage is done.’”

“Persky said the media scrutiny and the trial itself served as punishment to all involved and made him wonder what sentence could erase any of that,” a Guardian reporter noted:

In the end, he believed a long prison sentence would only harm Turner, who lost his ability to compete at the Olympics, even more.

I think you have to take the whole picture in terms of what impact imprisonment has on a specific individual’s life. And the impact statements that have been – or the, really, character letters that have been submitted do show a huge collateral consequence for Mr. Turner based on the conviction.

So this morning, as he attends a conference of conservative evangelical ministers put on by the gay bashing hate group Family Research Council, Governor Pat McCrory still wants us to elect a president whose view of the women and children of North Carolina encompasses his right to sexually assault them at will, because calling on Trump to stand down from the nomination- or even withdrawing McCrory’s endorsement, would have yuuuge collateral consequences for Trump (who was 59 and six months into his third marriage at the time) and his chances to realize his career ambitions.

Donald Trump: You know and I moved on her actually. You know she was down on Palm Beach.

Unknown: She used to be great. She’s still very beautiful.

Trump: I moved on her and I failed. I’ll admit it. I did try and f*** her. She was married.

Unknown: That’s huge news.

Trump. No, no, Nancy. This was— And I moved on her very heavily in fact. I took her out furniture shopping. She wanted to get some furniture. I said I’ll show you where they have some nice furniture. I took her out furniture. I moved on her like a bitch, but I couldn’t get there, and she was married.

Then all of a sudden I see her, she’s now got the big, phony tits and everything. She’s totally changed her look.

[The men spot Arianne Zucker waiting for them outside the bus]

Bush: Sheesh, your girl’s hot as shit. In the purple.

Trump: Whoa! Yes! Whoa!

Unknown: Yes! The Donald has scored. Whoa, my man!

Trump: Look at you. You are a pussy.

[crosstalk as the bus doors open and close - Trump is still on the bus]

Trump: Maybe it’s a different one.

Bush: It better not be the publicist. No, it’s her. It’s —

Trump: Yeah, that’s her. With the gold. I better use some Tic Tacs just in case I start kissing her. You know I’m automatically attracted to beautiful - I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait.

And when you’re a star they let you do it. You can do anything.

Bush: Whatever you want.

Trump: Grab them by the pussy. You can do anything.

Bush: Yeah those legs, all I can see is the legs.

Trump: Oh, it looks good.

Bush: Come on, shorty.

Trump: Oh, nice legs, huh?

Bush: Oof, get out of the way, honey. Oh, that’s good legs. Go ahead.

Trump: It’s always good if you don’t fall out of the bus. Like Ford, Gerald Ford, remember?

[Trump knocks on the bus door to get out]

Bush: Down below. Pull the handle.

Trump: Hello. How are you? Hi.

Arianne Zucker: Hi Mr Trump. How are you?

Trump: Nice seeing you. Terrific, terrific. You know Billy Bush?

Bush: Hello, nice to see you. How you doing, Arianne?

Zucker: I’m doing very well, thank you. Are you ready to be a soap star?

Trump: We’re ready, let’s go. Make me a soap star.

Bush: How about a little hug for the Donald? He just got off the bus.

Zucker: Would you like a little hug, darling?

Trump: Absolutely. Melania said this was okay.

Bush: How about a little hug for the Bushy? I just got off the bus. Here we go. Excellent. Well you’ve got a nice co-star here.

Trump: Good. After you. Come on, Billy, don’t be shy.

[The three of them start walking towards the set]

Bush: Soon as a beautiful woman shows up he just, he takes off. This always happens.

Let the little guy in here, come on.

Zucker: Yeah let the little guy in. How you feel now? Better? I should actually be in the middle.

Bush: it’s hard to walk next to a guy like this. Yeah, you get in the middle. There we go.

Zucker: This is much better. This is—

Trump: That’s better.

Bush: Now, if you had to choose honestly between one of us. Me or the Donald?

Trump: I don’t know, that’s rough competition. That’s some pressure right there.

Bush: Seriously, you had to take one of us as a date.

Zucker: I have to take the Fifth on that one. Yep. I’ll take both.

That was when Trump was only a celebrity.

Imagine what he thinks he will be able to do as President of the United States.

No comments:

Post a Comment