Waldo Lydecker's Journal.: "Crazy is as crazy does." The question is, who's crazy here?

Here's a conundrum:

Alan Keyes pretty much defines Conservative Crazy Eyedness.

He's the only man we can think of who ran for US President under three different parties in one year.

And lost under all three.

Not to mention his failed 1988 US Senate campaign in Maryland, managed by failed NY Times columnist and Palin tour-boat backer Bill Kristol. In his failed 1992 race for the Senate he took a big salary but got his ass kicked big time, sans Kristol.

Keyes ran for President in 1996 and 2000. Both times, big goose eggs.

In 2004 he parachuted into Illinois. They had a Senate seat open. Result: Obama's now president. FAIL.

Back to 2008. He got ..06% in the Texas primary. Shifting to the Constitution Party, he was still running as a GOPer and got 2.7% in NC- two GOP delegates to the party he'd already abandoned. The Constitutionalists kicked his ass out the door so he picked up the fallen standard of George Wallace's American Independent Party, abandoned by Congressman John Schmitz, who pupped Mary Kay LeTourneau, America's most famous child rapist. Just sayin.' This is a public service outlet after all.

Since then the Keyeser's become a birther. 'Natch.

One could go one.

Endlessly in fact.

The man's a clown car stuffed to the gills with self-hatred and a relentless desire to be back on the public payroll for as long as possible.

But what makes Reagan's Toby stand out today is this:

Here's something you don't hear very often: a prominent Republican's policy position is too conservative for Alan Keyes. Speaking at a Tea Party Express-sponsored event in Washington this morning, Keyes said Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC) is being irresponsible by suggesting, as he did recently, that the 14th Amendment may have been a bad idea.

Graham told Fox News that he plans to introduce a constitutional amendment that would remove automatic birthright citizenship for all babies born in the United States, even if their parents are here illegally. Graham and other Republicans have been whipping up opposition to the 14th Amendment, which they say encourages illegal immigrants to come to America with the plan to have babies who will automatically become U.S. citizens.

Keyes suggested that he shared the concern over so-called "anchor babies" with Graham and his allies, but he said that "the 14th Amendment is not the problem." Rather, he seemed to suggest, it's a mistaken interpretation of the amendment that's at fault. Changing the wording of the amendment would be a mistake, Keyes said -- and talk like Graham's is downright dangerous.

"The 14th Amendment is not something one should play with lightly," Keyes said in response to a question from ThinkProgress at the Tea Party Express press event today. "Lindsay Graham used the term -- as people have carelessly done over the years -- referring to the 14th Amendment as something that has to do with 'birthright citizenship' and we ought to get rid of 'birthright citizenship.'"

"Well, let me see," Keyes added sarcastically, "If citizenship is not a birthright then it must be a grant of the government. And if it is a grant of the government, it could curtail that grant in all the ways that fascists and totalitarians always want to."