Hat tricks

Waldo's report on ancient Roman travel agents was well-received by readers ("Thanks for a post that isn't depressing," one wrote).

We're all Graeco-Romans now, as Nixon might have said had he been a contemporary of Cicero's (Ricardus Felonius Nixoniensis?) Waldo finished Thomas Cahill's Sailing The Wine-Dark Sea: Why The Greeks Matter over the weekend, and was reminded anew of how his heart will always pine for the lands of the Hellenes (not to mention of the brilliance of Cahill's writing style). And remember, in Waldo's Blogside Reading is the always-entertaining work of Cambridge classics scholar Mary Beard.

But today's Borowitz Report moves us a little ahead in time:

LONDON (The Borowitz Report) - The Church of England, an institution whose origins date back to the sixth century A.D., has far more modern views about the rights of women than Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, experts said today. 

“In recognizing that women are the equals of men, the Church of England has embraced a position that is centuries ahead of Scalia’s,” Davis Logsdon, a professor of religion at the University of Minnesota, said. “This is a remarkable achievement, given that Scalia was born in 1936 and the Church began in the late five hundreds.” 

But Dr. Carol Foyler, a history professor at the University of Sussex, took issue with that assessment. “I date the beginning of the Church of England to 1534, when it was officially established under Henry VIII,” she said. “But regardless of whether the Church is fourteen centuries old or five centuries old, it’s unquestionably more modern than Scalia.” 

As for Justice Scalia, he seemed to dismiss the controversy, issuing a terse official statement Monday afternoon. “I do not keep up with the goings on of every newfangled institution,” he said.

 
Maybe not so far apart as we think...