Thursday, April 6, 2017

Off to give God a piece of his mind








Don Rickles, the cheerfully rude comic, died today, a month short of turning 90.

Like other standup geniuses- Jonathan Winters and Henny Youngman come to mind, success in movies and series television largely eluded Rickles, but he made himself a household name to generations of Americans anyway. He didn't give you any choice.

Who picks your clothes - Stevie Wonder?

Famous people are deceptive. Deep down, they're just regular people. Like Larry King. We've been friends for forty years. He's one of the few guys I know who's really famous. One minute he's talking to the president on his cell phone, and then the next minute he's saying to me, 'Do you think we ought to give the waiter another dollar?'

I think if I took therapy, the doctor would quit. He'd just pick up the couch and walk out of the room.

Italians are fantastic people, really. They can work you over in an alley while singing an opera.

Eddie Fisher married to Elizabeth Taylor is like me trying to wash the Empire State Building with a bar of soap. 

I was nice to the people in the Philippines for the two and a half years I was there, because I knew eventually I'd have to kiss up to them so my grandchildren could have toys.

Once in a while, when I'm alone, I think about my age. I think, How many more years do I have on this earth? But I can't really conceive of dying. Somehow, in my head, I don't think I'll die. I know that everybody dies, of course. I just think that it'll never come to me. It's crazy, but there it is.


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