What Fresh Hell? for November 11-12, 2017: Who's more embarrassing- Moore or Trump?

Since just 2015, conservatives have gone from "gay marriage will destroy the moral fabric of america" to "who hasn't dry humped a 14 year old??"

— Travis Helwig (@travishelwig) November 10, 2017

Having dumped loser Luther Strange for the stranger- in every sense- Roy Moore, MOTUS says he can’t comment on their shared interest in teenage girls because the *resident hardly ever has time to watch TV. It’s the only way to get news, see, and in Asia Fox & Friends comes on tomorrow and they can’t know the news yet.

The truth is, MOTUS thinks Moore’s a loser. Everybody knows you can’t score any 10s hanging around the mall in Gadsden, Alabama. Loser, bigly.

And a woman who worked with him says everyone did, indeed, know Moore was a creep.

Sidestepping whether he is a creep, Moore says it couldn’t’a happened coz,

“I’ve been investigated more than any other person in this country,” he said.

Tell that to Ray Donovan, Ronald Reagan's Labor secretary, who spent four years under a cloud only to be exonerated. “Which office do I go to to get my reputation back?” he asked.

Yet people are still stumbling over old Moore decisions like the one where he was the only state supreme court justice to side with the man who raped a four-year-old on grounds there was no provable threat of imminent harm.

It's in the evangelical Bible study guide.

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Having it both ways, the *resident also says,

he believes Vladimir Putin’s denials of Russian involvement in the manipulation of the 2016 presidential election.

However, he appeared to contradict himself on Sunday when he said he was “with our agencies” on the question of Russian interference.

Putin also said he was offended by US media, so Trump promised to learn to say, “failing New York Times” in Russian.

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Asian leaders discovered the way to keep MOTUS from acting out is to line up masses of troops for him to walk past, give speeches saying he’s a demigod, and feed him cheeseburgers from Air Force One’s galley.

That way he doesn’t diss them the way he does at home.

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There was a smidgen of other news this weekend:

-A Reddit user pointed out that Hong Kong-based sex toy company Lovense's remote control vibrator app (Lovense Remote) recorded a use session without their knowledge. An audio file lasting six minutes was stored in the app's local folder. The users says he or she gave the app access to the mic and camera but only to use with the in-app chat function and to send voice clips on command — not constant recording when in use. Other users confirmed this app behavior, too.

A user claiming to represent Lovense responded and called this recording a "minor bug" that only affects Android users.

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In news to gladden the hearts of America’s #lAltRight, a Saudi publication says populism works best when imposed by those seeking to consolidate unaccountable power:

...More importantly, in a country beset by an extremely wide political spectrum ranging from the extreme religious right to the liberal left, achieving consensus on key issues is virtually impossible. Hence, if any reform is to take place within a reasonable time frame, it will have to be autocratically managed. Reforms such as removing the prohibition on women’s driving, combating extremism, and curbing elite entitlements would have been impossible to accomplish through deliberation and consensus. Coercive action and an authoritarian hand, rather than endless debate, discussion, and negotiation with thousands of royals and political, economic, and religious elites, was needed to drive home to these individuals that the monarchy is serious about fundamental reform and that the “old guard” needs to get with the program or face dire consequences.

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It peeves MOTUS that he can’t revoke Obama’s Nobel Peace Prize, so he has focused, for a minute, on winning his own.

Someone told him Teddy Roosevelt got one for brokering peace in an Asian war, so the *resident announced he is willing to be a sort of honest broker:

“South China Sea — as you know, we're looking at — we're looking at it together. If I could help mediate or arbitrate, please let me know,” Trump said at the presidential palace in Hanoi, Vietnam, where he met with President Tran Dai Quang.

“I know we've had a dispute for quite a while with China. If I can help in any way, I'm a very good mediator and a very good arbitrator. I have done plenty of it from both sides. So if I can help you, let me know.”